It's late and I should be in bed, but I feel like writing a bit on nonsense before I do. Plus, it is one hour and twenty two minutes into my birthday so far, so I think I can do what I want to now that I'm the ripe old age of 25.
So shockingly old. Yeah right.
This last year was astounding to say the least. I saw a lot and did a lot that I never thought I'd do in a life time. I think one of the most impactful things was Ottawa. Never in a million years would I have expected to be walking into the offices of my federal government bringing a message of change, revolution and the Kingdom. Never in a billion years would I have expected such a change to sweep our nation and watch as this fire would go to ignite churches coast to coast. And it keeps going... I'm astonished most of the time.
This last year I also got a cell phone. This is monumental. I did happen to get it three days ago, but still... it was last year. And this is also a sign of the immanent return of Jesus himself.
This last year I had a life changing trip to North Carolina. I think... no... I know it was such a change that it will forever effect the rest of my life and how I see things. I am still amazed at the difference of how I see things around me and in me. Some of it is good and better, some of it isn't. But I did meet God all over again while I was there which helps you to remember that no matter what you see, just as long as you look at Him everything will come out right in the end.
I don't know if I can word this one right, but this year I saw myself come to a place of influence in the nation that I also never expected. I still don't know what to think about it. Things like the Canadian Prophetic Council, just recently the Alberta Regional Prophetic Council, things with Watchmen, of course MyCanada and working more with the business community more. And never have I felt this to be so empty if one makes "ministry" and "position" anything even remotely close to their goal. Never have I seen so clearly, especially in the last few weeks, how off the mark we are in our outworkings and attitudes.
I'm not saying these things are bad, they are incredibly good. I think I'm just having a revelation that I should have gotten deeper many years ago. It's something I've always known in my head, but now that my heart is getting used to the idea I've seen how little I did actually KNOW.
Oh dear... I could write a book about that right now... and I probably will, but not right now.
This year I learned how much I value friends and how important family is.
This year I saw even more how much I want Jesus. The real Jesus. Not the set rules and programs, but the real Jesus. I saw how much I really enjoy being with God and how much I love to help people find Him too. The real Him. Not the make believe "let's talk and pray and do nothing about it" stuff, but the real God who causes people to change in ways they never thought could happen, who causes people to take up the cause and really see the world change for the better, who causes people to love with no strings or conditions and just always long for more...
This year I became more comfortable with myself and learned more not to need people, but authentically enjoy them, love them and be friends with them.
This year I learned that nothing can ever compare with the greatness of really knowing HIM.
This year I got about 75 different hair styles and rocked them all.
This year I made my first ebay purchase.
This year I said goodbye to Remi and regretted not answering those tugs I felt on my heart to connect again with my friend I grew up with. This year I felt what it was like to be too late and have that be a definate end.
This year I learned even more that God is the one who is going to make my dreams come true so I better just move out of the way, focus everything on Him and watch as life unfolds better and more incredible then my dreams could have ever come up with.
This year I learned the real purpose of my life, why I'm here and what to do. I haven't the faintest clue how I'm going to do it, but that is part of the fun. It kind of goes along with a new journal I started half way through the year. As I wrote in the first pages I had such an overwhelming desire to be able to read through the rest of the journal to see what the future would hold. But the only way I would be able to do that was if I really lived because then I could fill in all the blank spaces and I'd see what I needed to see as time went on.
I can't wait to turn the next page.